Archive for the ‘Nation of Domination’ Category

Facial Hair… There Ain’t Nothin Wrong With That!

February 9, 2009
To some people big messy facial hair is something to laugh and poke fun at; to others it can be considered artwork. As a man who can grow some decent facial hair I understand the time and effort that needs to be put in to grow a respectable cheek rug. After doing some extensive research I have come up with a list of the Picasso’s of facial hair throughout the sports world. Enjoy the pure beauty these men have on their faces.

Best Dick Broom (Moustache)

Rollie Fingers – Oakland A’s, San Diego Padres, Milwaukee Brewers (1968 – 1985)

Lanny McDonald – Toronto Maple Leafs, Colorado Rockies, Calgary Flames (1973 – 1989)

George Parros – Los Angeles Kings, Colorado Avalanche, Anaheim Ducks (2005 – Present)

Greg Maddux – Chicago Cubs, Atlanta Braves, San Diego Padres, Los Angeles Dodgers (1986 – 2008)

Dennis Eckersley – Cleveland Indians, Boston Red Sox, Chicago Cubs, Oakland A’s, St. Louis Cardinals (1975 – 1998)

Best Chin Scarf (Goatee)

Jeff Bagwell – Houston Astros (1991 – 2005)

Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart – The Hart Foundation (1979 – 1996)
Jay Buhner – New York Yankees, Seattle Mariners (1987 – 2001)
Nick Swisher – Oakland A’s, Chicago White Sox, New York Yankees (2004 – Present)
Alexi Lalas – New England Revolution, Kansas City Wizards, Los Angeles Galaxy (1994 – 2003)
Best Ear Handles (Side Burns)
Joe Mauer – Minnesota Twins (2004 – Present)
Walt Frazier – New York Knicks, Cleveland Cavaliers (1967 – 1980)
Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Nation of Domination (1995 – 2004)
Artis Gilmore – Chicago Bulls, San Antonio Spurs, Boston Celtics     (1972 – 1989)
Brady Anderson – Boston Red Sox, Baltimore Orioles, Cleveland Indians (1988 – 2002)
Best Flavor Saver (Fu Manchu)
Joe Namath – New York Jets, Los Angeles Rams (1965 – 1977)
Scott Player – Arizona Cardinals, Cleveland Browns (1998 – 2007)

Al Hrabosky – St. Louis Cardinals, Kansas City Royals, Atlanta Braves (1970 – 1982)
Rod Beck – San Francisco Giants, Chicago Cubs, Boston Red Sox, San Diego Padres (1991 – 2004)
Sal Fasano – Kansas City Royals, Oakland A’s, Colorado Rockies, Anaheim Angels, Baltimore Orioles, Philadelphia Phillies, New York Yankees, Toronto Blue Jays, Cleveland Indians (1996 – Present)
Best Pussy Tickler (Beard)

Bill Lee – Boston Red Sox, Montreal Expos (1962 – 1982)
Glen Hubbard – Atlanta Braves, Oakland A’s (1978 – 1989)
Bruce Sutter – Chicago Cubs, St. Louis Cardinals, Atlanta Braves     (1976 – 1988)
Lyle Alzado – Denver Broncos, Cleveland Browns, Oakland Raiders (1971 – 1985)
Mike Commodore – New Jersey Devils, Carolina Hurricanes, Ottawa Senators, Columbus Blue Jackets (2000 – Present)
I understand that there are countless athletes sporting some chin curtains or even a mouth brow (not to be mistaken with eye brow) that I have forgotten so feel free to comment on anyone who you feel was left out. If this list of masterpieces didn’t tickle your fancy than contact Sahli, a Thunder Treats contributor, his Struthers high school yearbook is dripping with brutal facial hair.

*Thank Dilo for his knowledge of nicknames for facial hair*